a year ago

Dear Madelyn Kate,

A year ago today I found out you were growing inside of me. It was a Sunday morning. I was in total shock and disbelief (especially considering a silly doctor told me that would be near impossible less than two months before). I sat through church next to your Daddy...holding his hand and desperately wanting to blurt it out as loud as I could. I wrote him a little note with Ephesians 4: 20 on it. The sheer fact that your little body was being knit together inside of me was a testimony to the truth that "He is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine", a scripture I had claimed in my life. We went to lunch with friends...I could not wipe the smile off of my face and officially kicked my Diet Coke habit that day just for you. I went shopping at Sam's with your Grandma...not telling her was SO hard...especially when we went down the baby aisle. I went to the mall to find the perfect way to tell your Daddy. I found the most adorable "I love Daddy" onesie. I told him that night when he came home from church. It was special in every way. I left him a little mail box on the counter and stood waiting with my camera. I love that we have a picture of his initial reaction. He was so excited (and also in disbelief).
A year ago today our lives changed forever. I am so glad they did. From the moment we knew you were inside of me...we knew you were a gift. We knew life would be different. We knew that it would no longer just be the two of us walking through this life together. We would soon be a family of three.

A year ago today, although I knew life would not be the same, I never imagined that it would be as sweet as this. That I would be a stay-at-home-mom (thanks to a hard working hubby) to the gift that on this day last year, was so new inside of me that your heart had yet to take it's first beat. That I would spend my day exactly one year later playing with a 19 week old who is already full of so much personality.That I would have a daily reminder in you of God's handiwork...his marvelous design.A year ago today, although I knew our lives would change, I never imagined that your Daddy and I would have traveled this road...filled with so many highs and lows...to be sitting here together one year later, in awe of how far you have come. I have told you before, but I am only repeating myself because it is true...you are our miracle Madelyn Kate. You have been our miracle since the day we first learned about you...February 8, 2009. A year ago today, I found out that I would soon be a Mommy. I was not sure what that meant. I am so thankful that you gave me that title and that you daily teach me what it means to be your Mommy. I love you, sweet girl.

"The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you; the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace." Numbers 6:24-26

Love,
Mommy