provision

Madelyn,
A lot has happened in the last few days that I want to tell you about. We took you to your first Luminate concert in Longview on Thursday night. Macey came to play with you Friday morning. Courtney came to see you too. When Macey's mommy came to pick her up you got sick all over her. You were feeling better by the afternoon though and geared up for your quick visit on Saturday morning from Gigi, Papa and Granny. You had an amazing day with them and then this morning we went to church and then came home for a photo shoot with an amazing photographer. You were all tuckered out after we were done...I have pictures of all of the fun. Maybe tomorrow I will show you the pictures and tell you more about the events of the last 4 days...but tonight, I just want to tell you that I love you.

When we were playing on the floor together tonight you gave me quite a scare. You coughed a little bit and then started flailing your arms. Your eyes were big as you looked up at me...you looked scared. I knew something was wrong. All of a sudden you started to turn blue.

It was one of the scariest moments of my life. All of the other episodes that you have been having happen when you are asleep. I have not seen you quit breathing while awake since we left the NICU. It was awful. Those big, scared eyes are something that I will never forget.

I am sorry that your reflux is so bad. I am praying that this is something that you grow out of soon. You are my precious little girl and I know that God's provision is, and will continue to be, perfect for our family...perfect for you. Love you Maddie Kate.

Love,
Mommy

"But as for me, I trust in you, oh Lord. I say, "My future is in your hands". Psalm 34: 14-15

5 months

Dear Madelyn Kate,
You are 5 months old. Every day with you is a new adventure. I love it. Just when I think I have you all figured out, you start something new. On Wednesday morning (your actual '5 month birthday') you sat up for 10 seconds on your own. Oh my! I am not sure who was more shocked...me or you!! Then on Thursday you rolled over from back to front on the floor (you had just been rolling over on our bed). I missed it, but you began squealing right away!
You love to talk. I think you get that from me. The other day we were talking back and forth and I had a little day dream to the day when we will have our first mother-daughter chat. For now, when we talk, you always have a serious look on your face when you respond. You raise and lower your eyebrows and change your expression with each sound. I wish I knew what you were thinking.You have met a lot of new people this month. You love going to youth group on Wednesday nights. I think you are going to be a social little thing, because you are always looking around and making eye contact with everyone when we are out and about.You still love music. No surprise there. You go to bed every night listening to worship songs and waking up to them too. I sing to you when no one else is around. I am definitely lacking in the musical abilities but you love for me to sing to you anyway. You always smile when I sing "Jesus loves me" and laugh when I sing "The Itsy Bitsy Spider". When you were sick yesterday, I sang "Healer" to you as I rocked you. Even though it sounded nothing like Kari Jobe's version, you knew it. You instantly relaxed and within a couple of minutes were asleep.These days you grab on to everything around you. Toys. Clothes. Earrings. Your favorite is definitely hair. You pull my hair. You pull Daddy's hair. You don't discriminate...you pull everyone's hair. You love to rub your hands on Daddy's beard. Every once in a while you will give it a good yank and he squeals. It's pretty comical. You always have a hold of your feet. If you have socks on, you yank and yank until you have pulled them off.You love to play "Peek-a-boo" or "Where's Madelyn?". I enjoy it too. You are quite the ticklish little thing. Your thighs and tummy seem to be the best spots to really get you laughing. Speaking of laughing...your laugh is the sweetest little laugh I have ever heard. I am not sure how exactly how long you are or how much you weigh because we have not been to the doctor in a month!! That's a record!!! I am so proud of you! I do know that you are a growing girl. This month you moved up to size 2 diapers and you are in 3-6 month clothes full time now. Both of your eyes are starting to turn brown. The right more so than the left. Sometimes they look really blue and sometimes they look hazel. Soon enough I am sure they will be dark brown. You are such a good eater. You eat every 3 1/2-4 hours (some days longer and when your reflux is really bad you only go a couple of hours). You LOVE oatmeal cereal. You really have the hang of it. I have not given it to you every day, but I should because you really like it. You love to grab the spoon and guide it in to your mouth. I can't believe that in just a months time you will be moving on to eating more foods.
Madelyn, I am 292 months old (wouldn't it be funny if that's how adults referred to their age?). The five months that you have been in my life have been the most joyful, challenging, love filled months so far. As your Daddy and I have been busy watching the Winter Olympics, I have looked on as the cameras get a shot of the proud moms in the stands cheering on their babies. Last night we watched as a 21 year old American speed skater won a silver medal. As she crossed the finish line, the camera man quickly zoomed in on a crying mother yelling, "That's my baby! That's my baby!". It was a special moment for me as I held you in my arms. You are my baby girl and you always will be. I love you sweet girl.

Love,
Mommy

tummy bug

Maddie Kate has the tummy bug.

It is not fun.

t.e.a.m.

There are some chores that I enjoy doing. When I was on bed rest. I would lay in my bed (fancy that? in my bed while on bed rest) and fantasize about vacuuming my living room. Seriously. I missed vacuuming. I also missed being able to bleach the kitchen sink. That's not a chore that I do on some sort of set day or schedule, but it makes my heart happy. It always looks so fresh and smells so clean once it has been done. I almost always ruin the shirt I am wearing when I do it. Just a tiny little dab normally, but enough to ruin the shirt none the less.

One chore that I just don't care much for?

Laundry.

I.strongly.dislike.laundry.

It's not so much the sorting. Or the washing. Or the drying. It's the hanging. It's the folding. It's the putting away that I strongly dislike.

My husband is pretty much a laundry champ. It has always made me feel silly that he is more productive when it comes to getting the laundry sorted, washed, dried, hung, folded and put away than I am. Like I am sort of falling short on my "wife" duties.

Now, thanks to my new laundry buddy...
I am quite the laundry champ also, if I do say so myself.

Madelyn gets bored of it rather quickly...which causes me to work faster.

We are quite the team.

My second grade teacher was right.
Together everyone achieves more.

Thank goodness for laundry buddies.

just the facts

Yesterday morning was busy with getting Luke's car running again. Thankfully it did not cost us the small fortune that we had been quoted (and so far it is still running ok). Woo-hoo!

After taking care of the car, we went on a little family lunch outing to Einstein Brother's Bagels. It was so yummy. Madelyn just hung out in her car seat carrier and looked at all the people.
She kept flashing me sweet little smiles so I took my camera out in hopes to catch one. Every time I tried to take a picture of her, she would give me this look that said, "I am not going to smile for you."

From there we made a quick stop at a friend's house so that he could meet Madelyn. She was such a little sweetie and loved meeting Cody.

Cody is a good friend from high school and the lead guitarist for Luminate. They are playing at Freeman Coliseum in San Antonio Friday night so if you are within driving distance you should definitely check it out.

How cute are they together?? Madelyn quite possibly could be Cody's youngest fan! We probably should have him sign something to help fund her college education some day!

When we made it back to the house, Madelyn was ready to play. She loves sitting in her high chair these days. Give her a few toys and she entertains herself (usually long enough to cook dinner and clean up around the kitchen).

She constantly jabbers when she is sitting there and

I love having her in the kitchen with me.

Yesterday she did not stay in there long because my sister had some company that wanted her to hang out with them downstairs. Luke worked from home all afternoon and evening while I made deer chili and cornbread and Madelyn hung out with Leah

and James

and my sister and Ashleigh.

It snowed from about 10am-8pm at our house. It did not really begin to stick until early afternoon, but it was more fun to watch than rain! I can't believe how much snow we have gotten this winter. Only once that it actually accumulated enough to really play in, but still...we have had more than I can ever remember from years past.

Last night when Luke and Madelyn were talking on Skype with Luke's parents, they were goofing around and entertaining us all.

The other night Luke caught Madelyn's bedtime babbling on video. Every night when Madelyn is just about asleep, she all the sudden opens her eyes wide and starts to babble. It is so funny and so hard not to laugh.

Daddy's girl?

I'd say so...

After a few days of not being able to blog due to a hacker, I was able to catch up on the happenings of the weekend thanks to a friendly Google troubleshooting guy by the name of Brad. Thank you, Brad. I was starting to have major withdrawals. My hand didn't twitch and I didn't get headaches, but I was really missing it for sure.

Madelyn is growing SO fast. Her little personality is forming by the minute. So are the rolls on her sweet little thighs. My goodness, she is a doll. Today we did absolutely NOTHING productive until around 3pm. Lazy? Possibly. Did I enjoy playing on the floor for 3 hours this morning with my baby girl? Absolutely.

Hey...there is always tomorrow :)

it's happening...

Due to Luke's car being in the shop, Madelyn and I were not able to join Luke at church today. It's probably a good thing. The little one was a bit crabby. Over the past couple of weeks she has really started to gnaw on her hands...pacifiers...toys...basically anything that she can figure out how to get in to her mouth. I have found myself wondering if it could possibly be happening. I am not wondering anymore. It's no secret. I think the pictures speak for themselves...

Although the doctor said that it could be months (MONTHS of this misery for the little one?? and mom and dad??) before they actually break through, I think it's safe to say that our almost 5 month old is teething. Pray for us. Ha! But seriously...I can already tell this is not one of those "warm, fuzzy, fun milestones".

Any suggestions from the pros on how to make it a little less painful for all involved??

{past, present, future}

Dear Madelyn Kate,
This week has been long. I feel like I have been going non stop. Although you command my attention when we are home, this is the first time since you entered this world that I have been this busy with activities that did not involve poopy diapers and making sure you are fed. To be honest, it has been a much needed rejuvenation. Refreshing to Mommy's spirit. This does not mean that I love you any less, but as Daddy puts it, Mommy needs to feel like "more than a walking refrigerator".

Aside from all the "stuff " that busied most of our week, this weekend I got the chance to take pictures at 3 events celebrating 20 years of Women's Ministry at Green Acres Baptist Church. I am by no means a professional photographer, but the Women's Minister just wanted some good shots for memories sake. Friday afternoon I was sort of questioning why I committed to doing all 3 events considering I would have to leave you for all 3 of them. Your Daddy said he wanted the special one-on-one time and that I needed to spend some time doing something that I am passionate about (other than taking care of you).

I am so glad that I did.

The last event of the weekend was a Celebration Concert. The best part about it...you and your Daddy came along! You decided you were hungry right after it started.
Your Aunt Rachel helped us find a private place to go so you could eat...but I really think you just wanted some good play time on the floor. Nothing seems more entertaining to you these days than your feet.
Eventually we emerged to enjoy the rest of the concert. The funny thing is...it did not turn out to be a concert at all. Travis Cottrell (accompanied by his band via iPod) and 3 singers were there to give everyone a "good show". I think the only "show" they gave was this one back stage before it started...That's Linda Lisniewski (current GABC Women's Minister) and Chris Adams (former GABC Women's Minister) in the middle of Travis and his gang making crazy faces. I am pretty sure that is my favorite picture from the entire weekend.

Instead of giving a "show" or a concert...they led the group in an intimate time of worship. A time of thanksgiving to the Lord for all He has done. More than the show that people paid $10 to see...they were led to the throne room by an amazing man with an authentic heart for worship.
Madelyn, it was awesome. I had been so excited earlier in the day that this would be your first concert!! Your Daddy and I used to go to LOTS of concerts. I just knew this would be the start of toting you along to enjoy some with us. The evening was so much better than being able to say, "We took you to your first concert."
Even though you were asleep in Daddy's arms, powerful words were sung over you as you rested.
When I looked up at the screen as we were singing (a song that I have heard many times before) I was overcome with emotion. Sweet Madelyn, you were bought with the precious blood of Christ. As trivial as this may sound...it was the first time in your little life that I remember thinking about those words in relation to you.But it's true. Some day when you are older, you will understand what that means. The gravity of those words is still something that leaves me in awe of our Father. Now more than ever, knowing how precious the life of your child is, the sacrifice that was made for me and for YOU is one that I find myself breathless when thinking about.

In that moment, I almost lost focus of what I was there to do...take pictures! Ha!

I did take more pictures. A lot more pictures.

The thing that I really wanted to tell you though about the weekend is this, Madelyn...

Through the course of this weekend...witnessing the celebration of a Women's Ministry...the impact that it has had on SO many lives...this picture means the most to me...
To me, it represents Women's Ministry past and present. One faithful servant who handed the torch to another. Although the one who "handed off the torch" is very much so an integral part of Women's Ministries across the country through her work at Lifeway, her local involvement at GABC is in days gone by.

Why does that mean the most to me?? It made me realize that what I do for the Kingdom (or don't do for that matter) is what will be handed off to you! When I felt the Lord whispering that to me through what I was witnessing this weekend I was burdened. Left wondering what impact I was really making. It was tough to even think about. I kept thinking..."but I can't do something this great Lord." Neither could they. It was simply the power of Christ in them.Some day we will stand side by side to take a picture. It will be a picture of life past and present. Right now, you represent the future. I want to be able to leave a legacy for you that is not only something that you will be proud of, but that will allow you to serve and minister in ways that you are gifted.

As you laid across your Daddy's arms during the worship celebration, God stirred my heart to do something for you. To do something for your future.
Although it was hard to spend several hours apart this weekend, I am thankful for the blessings I received as I captured some memories for these ladies with my camera.

I love you, sweet Madelyn. Love,
Mommy

This is a few days old...but I love it and had to share.

Gosh, I love life with these two.

oh, friday.

Oh, Friday. You have come and gone so quickly. You were jam packed with fun. Now you have left us (until next week rolls around).

This morning Madelyn said goodbye to Great Granny Joyce as she headed back to Fort Worth to spend some more time with her sister. She will hopefully be back next weekend to see the sweet little girl again! Madelyn loved their time together. There were definitely lots of kisses and smiles. Who wouldn't want to kiss those cheeks?

After that we took a little family drive to drop Luke's Escape off at the repair shop. Boo. I think that's my least favorite thing to spend money on. We are praying for minor problems. (Yes. Praying for our car. Haha!)

When we got back to the house, Madelyn was snoozing in her car seat....with her hand holding her ear out as if she was trying to hear our conversations...

She slept just like that for at least 30 minutes. It was precious!

While Luke and Madelyn soaked up a Daddy/Daughter night, I had the chance to take pictures for a very special event. The Women's Ministry at Green Acres Baptist Church (where my sister works) is celebrating 20 years of ministry this weekend. They kicked off the weekend with an afternoon of reminiscing with the women who were a part of the original ministry.

My sister and the current Women's Minister at GABC, Linda Lesniewski.

It was so awesome to listen in as the women shared stories of the challenges they faced to get the ministry off the ground. They shared laughs about days gone by (and clothing and hair styles that were gladly left in the 80's). I cannot even really begin to process how God has stirred my heart from what I have been able to witness of this special celebration weekend so far. It was so awesome to see that this ministry did not grow in to what it is today over night. There were so many women (and men) who served faithfully and were open to what the Lord had in store. Things like this don't just happen. It started somewhere and these are the women (and man) that God used to do it...

I am looking forward to being able to witness, through the lens of my camera, what the rest of the celebration weekend has in store. I am thankful that I (and my limited photography skills) have been able to be a part in a very small way and blessed so much in the process!

After a quick run to the house to say, "hi" to the hubs and baby girl, my sister, sister-in-law and I headed to a baby scrapbook class! I had so much fun! I have not taken any pics of the layouts we made yet, but when I do I will have to share. I am the world's worst scrapbooker. I have all the supplies but rarely finish a project. This time it will be different. At least that's what I keep telling myself.

Oh, Friday. Thanks for the fun. See you again next week.